64: Aim Not for Perfection, But for Excellence (Part 1)
Prophet Muhammad (pbuh)]
Striving for Excellence Encouraged
Knowing the potential of the human being [Qur’an 95:5], the Creator commands us to strive for excellence [Qur’an 16:90]. Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) reminded us that, "Allah has prescribed excellence in everything you do". The notion of ihsaan implies doing what is good and right coupled with excellence in performance. This makes us realize that whatever is good is worth doing and whatever is worth doing, is worth doing well. The renowned Afro-American motivational sports coach Vincent Lombardi, once said that the quality of a person's life is in direct proportion to his/her commitment to excellence.
Preoccupation with Perfection Discouraged
Islam encourages healthy, self-actualizing individuals striving for excellence; but discourages neurotic, obsessive preoccupation with perfection. Researchers Dr.s Hewitt and Flett identify three components of perfectionism:
- self-oriented (unrealistic standards for self),
- other-oriented (unrealistic standards directed towards others),
- socially prescribed (belief that others have perfectionistic expectations for one’s self).
Perfectionism is...
- the irrational belief that you and/or your environment must be perfect
- an all pervasive attitude that whatever you attempt in life must be done to perfection with no deviation, mistakes, slip ups, or inconsistencies
- a habit developed that keeps you constantly alert to the imperfections, failings, and weakness in yourself and others
- a level of consciousness that keeps you ever vigilant to any deviations from the norm, the guidelines, or the way things are ‘supposed to be’
- the underlying motive present in the fear of failure and fear of rejection, (i.e. if I am not perfect I will fail and/or I will be rejected by others)
- a rigid, moralistic outlook that does not allow for humanism or imperfection
- the belief that no matter what you attempt it is never ‘good enough’ to meet your own expectation or the expectation of others.
Contra-Distinction between Perfectionists & Strivers for Excellence
Setting high standards is a great thing. However, perfectionism coupled with a punishing attitude towards one's own efforts can cripple the imagination, kill the spirit, and handicap performance. Many psychologists view perfectionism as "the striving for that nonexistent perfection that keeps people in turmoil and is associated with a significant number of psychological problems." [Dr Pacht, The Promises and Pitfalls of Perfectionistic Behaviours]. A number of researchers sharing Dr Pacht's concern have linked perfectionism with depression, anorexia nervosa, bulimia, migraine, personality and psychosomatic disorders, Type A coronary-prone behavior and suicide. The research of Dr.s Hewitt and Flett (who identified three components of perfectionism) links clinical depression with self-oriented perfectionism; and links anti-social and narcissistic personality disorders with other-oriented perfectionism.
| Perfectionist | Striver for Excellence |
|---|---|
| Often set standards beyond reach and reason | Sets high standards, not beyond reach |
| Is never satisfied by anything less than perfection | Enjoys process as well as outcome |
| Becomes overly defensive when criticized | Reacts positively to helpful criticism |
| Is preoccupied with fear of failure and disapproval -- this can deplete energy levels | Keeps normal anxiety and fear of failure and disapproval within bounds -- uses them to create energy |
| Sees mistakes as evidence of unworthiness | Sees mistakes as opportunities for growth and learning |
| May become dysfunctionally depressed when experiences failure and disappointment | Bounces back from failure and disappointment |
Note well that ...
- Strivers for Excellence are described as individuals who derive a very real sense of pleasure from the labors of a painstaking effort
- Perfectionists are those unable to feel satisfaction because in their own eyes they never seem to do things good enough to warrant that feeling.
Remember that striving for excellence motivates you; striving for perfection is demoralizing.
[Author, Harriet Braiker]